You know I never quite understood why people mourned the death of people they never even knew. I mean don’t get me wrong, I have cried at the funeral of people I didn’t know for the sheer fact, I hate to see other people suffering. But for those who completely fall out as if it was there own mother, I never quite got it…

That is until Whitney died!!

You see, I always felt like this day was coming but I prayed and prayed that it wouldn’t. I hoped when I woke up this morning that it would just be a horrible rumor. I hoped that I would wake up and this would all be a bad dream, but as I sit here typing I realize it’s not. I’m taking Whitney’s death extremely personal because she was my last hope. You see, my mother was a drug addict and I remember having that same hope for her until that faithful day when I realized she was no longer with us. I’m a realist, really I am.  I know that if you do drugs that eventually the drugs will win if you don’t get help,  but I still felt blindslided by my own mothers death. So when my mother died that hope I held on to as a little child died with her.  So, when Whitney was able to get herself clean and eventually return to the spotlight, I felt that sense of hope that I did for my very own mother. I was happy to see her return to her throne and I hoped she would stay. Then the rumors began to swirl again and I hoped the stories of her relapsing were false. I once again felt like that little girl who wanted her mother to get and stay clean.  Although we don’t know what killed Whitney what I do know is she will no longer suffer. Unless you’ve ever been addicted to drugs you will never know what the fight is like. I’ve seen it first hand and believe me when I say it’s a horrible, horrible fight.

To Whitney, although our journey has come to an end your life will be a true inspiration to millions… Say hello to my mother for me and ask her to forgive me, I didn’t understand until it was too late and she was gone.

To Bobbi Kristina, Though it hurts when any child loses their mother, especially so soon you must continue to fight. While, I realize this will hurt for a long time the sun will one day shine again the only difference is you will have you very own personal angel….

I will always love you Whitney….

*Forgive any grammatical errors, I'm just not in the mood now*